10 Lessons From My First 10 Years in Private Wealth Management

Over the last 10 years, I’ve had the privilege of walking alongside individuals and families as they navigate the unique complexities that accompany significant wealth. From helping first-generation wealth creators transition from business ownership to financial independence, to guiding families through the nuances of multigenerational planning, I’ve learned that money touches everything. However, the conversations I have are rarely just about investments. They’re about purpose, relationships, and identity.

I’ve learned 10 key lessons about life and money that keep resurfacing, regardless of market cycles or net worth. These ideas have shaped my thinking, influenced my work, and hopefully offer valuable insights for anyone navigating their own wealth journey.

These reflections aren’t just for clients—they’re life lessons for advisors, too. Whether you’re guiding others or navigating your own wealth journey, the principles below apply on both sides of the table.

1. Price is only relevant in the absence of value.

The most discerning clients I work with never ask, “What does this cost?” Their first question is, “What do I get for this?” Whether it’s an investment opportunity, or a new advisory relationship, they’re focused on the value being delivered. And rightly so. This mind-set leads to better decision-making because it creates staying power. When you’re clear on the value being offered, volatility becomes a cost you’re willing to endure.

2. Time is your most valuable asset.

Wealth buys many things, but not more time. Eventually, every serious wealth conversation leads back to this idea: How do you want to spend your time?

It’s a question I ask not just in financial planning sessions, but when clients are contemplating a major business decision, or thinking about estate planning. If a decision gives you more time back (or peace of mind), it’s almost always worth it.

3. You can’t control markets but you can control your response.

No one, regardless of their intelligence, education, or wealth can reliably predict short-term market movements. Realizing this becomes especially important during market dislocations.

I’ve seen clients paralyzed in fear during sharp drawdowns, and others overconfident during market rallies. The common thread among the most resilient investors? They have a plan and a set of principles that help them stay grounded when the world isn’t.

4. Life will bring tough times.

Have the right people in the room. The moments that define a family’s financial life are rarely easy: The death of a patriarch or matriarch, the sale of a decades-old business, or a contentious estate issue.

During these moments, having the right voices at the table is invaluable. Not just technically sound advisors but ones who can slow the conversation down, ask the hard questions, and help everyone see around corners. I’ve seen fortunes preserved and destroyed based on who was in the room when the big decisions got made.

5. Your reputation is everything.

In a 2002 Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting, Warren Buffett famously said, “It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.”

Reputation is a form of capital. It opens doors, builds trust, and creates opportunities. Reputational damage doesn’t just impact your business or brand. It can erode trust, compromise your legacy, and leave a trail that money alone can’t fix.

6. Find something that fills your cup outside of work.

One of the most underappreciated emotional challenges in wealth management is identity loss. For founders who sell a business, there’s often an unexpected void. Their calendars are clear. The adrenaline drops. And the big question looms: Who am I without this?

I’ve worked with entrepreneurs who quietly struggled in the aftermath of a liquidity event. It wasn’t because of bad investments or estate planning missteps; it was because they hadn’t figured out what was next. Wealth gives you the freedom to explore. But fulfillment doesn’t come from a term sheet or a balance sheet. It comes from purpose.

7. AI can do a lot, but it can’t do this.

I’m a big believer in technology. AI will transform many parts of finance. But it won’t replace the deeply human moments that shape how wealth is used, transferred, or protected.

There is no algorithm for grief. No AI can replace the emotional support a family needs during a health crisis or a generational wealth transfer. At Third View, we spend just as much time talking about family dynamics, communication, and values as we do about tax rates.

8. Timing the market is a fool’s errand.

Time in the market matters most. I’ve had clients ask whether they should wait until after the election, or until interest rates peak, or until valuations compress before investing. Here’s the hard truth: If you’re waiting for the perfect moment, you’ll miss it. Long-term wealth creation has far more to do with discipline than timing.

9. Just because you can afford it, doesn’t mean you should buy it.

Every financial decision has an acquisition cost and an opportunity cost. The higher the acquisition cost, the higher the opportunity cost. Spend wisely.

10. Humans overestimate risk and underestimate opportunity.

Fear is a powerful emotion. It shows up as cash hoarding, estate planning procrastination, or reluctance to involve the next generation in financial discussions. When we lean too heavily into risk avoidance, we can miss the upside. Whether it’s starting a new business venture, or taking on a meaningful philanthropic opportunity, fear can quietly erode the very benefits wealth is meant to provide.

The most successful clients I work with are optimistic. They understand risk, but they don’t let it paralyze them. They understand that the best opportunities rarely come gift-wrapped.

In conclusion.

The last 10 years has taught me that wealth is complex. However, with the right partners, the right mind-set, and the right values, it can be one of life’s great enablers. We named our firm Third View because there’s your view, there’s the view of the people around you, and there’s a third view—an integrated, long-term perspective that helps you make decisions with clarity and confidence. That’s the value that financial advisors can provide for clients.

This article originally appeared in Barron's.